hmm. cross training as if injured

i've continued to cross-train, but mentally i've given up on London and consider myself injured right now. I've eaten lots of things I wouldn't have done if London was still on the cards, and have probably put on 5lbs-8lbs or so in the space of a week and a half as my body adjusts to not burning 5000 calories a day, and absorbs the fat consumed in a desperate attempt at survival. I've not run a mile since monday I think. I'm going to cross train on the bike and do some weights tonight, and then again two or three times on saturday. get up early, exercise bike, probably sauna cause they have one of those at the gym and i've not done that for over a year. then sunday have a go at a 4 mile run on the trails in rock creek. there's no pain at all in my right shin. but it was like that two or three times before... each time only running 2 or 3 miles would reopen whatever damage there was previously. if, for some strange unforeseen reason, this time it's fixed, then london might still be a possibility. but I've still not run properly for 3 weeks now. which feels like ages. don't know how much my fitness has regressed, but mentally i've lost all momentum I had. if I did find myself in good enough health to run london it would take a lot of mentally geeing myself up to do it well. I don't think I'd want to do it just to complete it. therefore it might be better holding off and picking a marathon in june or july and racing that instead. what do I know? not much.